Australia's National Prison Newspaper

Australia's National
Prison Newspaper

ISSUE NO. 6

December 2024

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Letters

Bukks' Musings

By

Bukks

Bukks writes from Loddon Prison in Victoria.

'Familia" by Brendon, Boom Gate Gallery

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Dear About Time,

Hello. Thank you for publishing one of my poems, I was very happy to see it in About Time. I am doing 21 and a half years with a top of 23 and a half and came in way back in 2010. I spent about 13 years at the maximum-security Port Phillip Prison but am now at a medium security, Loddon. I have been here for almost two years now and since coming here have gotten into poetry. I have made three homemade draft books and have almost finished my fourth with the help of a teacher here. I showed a few people who really liked them and now I have written about 235 of them. I like doing it as it keeps me busy and helps me get stuff out.

I am glad you made the newspaper because, as the name says, it's about time! They should have had something like this for a long, long time. Years ago, I read one in the slot at Port Phillip that was from the A.C.T., they have it so different I was amazed. I did actually write to them but they never gave me a reply. Sorry I didn't write when I first sent poems, but I didn't know what to say. It can get so boring that any form of entertainment is good. Plus, it's exciting when it is new. I have a friend who was deported back to Malaysia not long ago and I was telling her all about it as she just missed it. I wish you had been around a lot longer.

I think you should mention the book 'Damage Done' about Warren Fellows who spent 11 years in Thailand. It was the first book I read way back in Tarana/Parkville and it was what got me into reading. Since then, I've read so many non-fiction books both in and out of prison.

This for sure will be my last sentence and I will be at least 50 when I get out. I hear when you turn that age that your chance of reoffending goes down to 2%. I breached my parole with my murder so my chances of actually getting it are probably very slim. I still have a tiny bit of hope that I will get it after doing the few months that I owe.

I've spent so long in prison that I've grown to despise it now, over half my life. They never really give you much help when you get out and, even inside, and it costs me a lot. I never really had any goals or realistic hopes and dreams but I do now. I want to get out, finish my parole and go to Malaysia to visit or maybe live with my lady friend. I have a little money now thanks to the child abuse redress scheme to give me a head start. I also have my own unit unlike a lot of people, but I'm not sure if I will be able to live there as I offended there back when I was 21.

My mum is my biggest support and I am undeserving of all she has done for me. My Dad passed away back in 2022 and I miss him so much; I hadn't got to see him in a while as he was unwell and I couldn't get someone to bring him in for me. I was very lucky to go to the funeral as it was at the end of Covid and I had just had my security rating dropped. My nan is also very old and I don't think she will hang on until I get out. I have missed and lost so very much that it hurts me nowadays. I missed both my sister's weddings, she now lives in the U.S.A. and I will most likely never be allowed to visit her there.

I can't say prison has given me much except a lot of perspective. I've had to go through a lot to be where I am now. I am still very worried I may never get out due to some law change or to do with the S.V.O. laws. I must admit that at times during my sentence I did hate myself for all I have done. When I started writing to my Malay friend at D.P.F.C. my view on everything changed drastically. If not for her I may still be 'stuck in the mud' at Port Phillip with my blinkers on.

Did you know that technically we are not allowed pen-pals that we do not know before our sentence? I think this is a dumb rule and we should have a way to meet people to write as another's perspective can change our own more than we could ever know. In other countries they have a way for inmates to meet people to write to, why are we stuck in the past? I must admit I did not know her before I wrote and she could have easily never replied to me, but I am so glad she did. Jail can be tough and to have someone caring in your life who is not your family is a big thing. I have come so far thanks to her that I couldn't even tell you. I hope I do get to go over and see her when my parole/sentence is finally over. I've been in so long it seems that I've forgotten what it's like to be free. I do get very depressed over it sometimes but what can you do? Just keep on keeping on and try to never give up. Poetry helps me now and is a big thing in my life taking up a lot of time. I'm lucky I can just come and use the computers during the week or all I've written may never have been. I feel like finally after all these years I have found something I am good at. With the internet around out there and so widely available I'm hoping I can use it and words to make a living somehow. I have added a few more poems for you and thanks again for publishing my other one, it feels really good.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and if you wanted to put it in About Time, that's okay too.

Take care and thanks for the paper as it is About Time, true! I wish you all the success in the world and will always look forward to seeing them every month.

Sincerely,

Bukks

Dear About Time,

Hello. Thank you for publishing one of my poems, I was very happy to see it in About Time. I am doing 21 and a half years with a top of 23 and a half and came in way back in 2010. I spent about 13 years at the maximum-security Port Phillip Prison but am now at a medium security, Loddon. I have been here for almost two years now and since coming here have gotten into poetry. I have made three homemade draft books and have almost finished my fourth with the help of a teacher here. I showed a few people who really liked them and now I have written about 235 of them. I like doing it as it keeps me busy and helps me get stuff out.

I am glad you made the newspaper because, as the name says, it's about time! They should have had something like this for a long, long time. Years ago, I read one in the slot at Port Phillip that was from the A.C.T., they have it so different I was amazed. I did actually write to them but they never gave me a reply. Sorry I didn't write when I first sent poems, but I didn't know what to say. It can get so boring that any form of entertainment is good. Plus, it's exciting when it is new. I have a friend who was deported back to Malaysia not long ago and I was telling her all about it as she just missed it. I wish you had been around a lot longer.

I think you should mention the book 'Damage Done' about Warren Fellows who spent 11 years in Thailand. It was the first book I read way back in Tarana/Parkville and it was what got me into reading. Since then, I've read so many non-fiction books both in and out of prison.

This for sure will be my last sentence and I will be at least 50 when I get out. I hear when you turn that age that your chance of reoffending goes down to 2%. I breached my parole with my murder so my chances of actually getting it are probably very slim. I still have a tiny bit of hope that I will get it after doing the few months that I owe.

I've spent so long in prison that I've grown to despise it now, over half my life. They never really give you much help when you get out and, even inside, and it costs me a lot. I never really had any goals or realistic hopes and dreams but I do now. I want to get out, finish my parole and go to Malaysia to visit or maybe live with my lady friend. I have a little money now thanks to the child abuse redress scheme to give me a head start. I also have my own unit unlike a lot of people, but I'm not sure if I will be able to live there as I offended there back when I was 21.

My mum is my biggest support and I am undeserving of all she has done for me. My Dad passed away back in 2022 and I miss him so much; I hadn't got to see him in a while as he was unwell and I couldn't get someone to bring him in for me. I was very lucky to go to the funeral as it was at the end of Covid and I had just had my security rating dropped. My nan is also very old and I don't think she will hang on until I get out. I have missed and lost so very much that it hurts me nowadays. I missed both my sister's weddings, she now lives in the U.S.A. and I will most likely never be allowed to visit her there.

I can't say prison has given me much except a lot of perspective. I've had to go through a lot to be where I am now. I am still very worried I may never get out due to some law change or to do with the S.V.O. laws. I must admit that at times during my sentence I did hate myself for all I have done. When I started writing to my Malay friend at D.P.F.C. my view on everything changed drastically. If not for her I may still be 'stuck in the mud' at Port Phillip with my blinkers on.

Did you know that technically we are not allowed pen-pals that we do not know before our sentence? I think this is a dumb rule and we should have a way to meet people to write as another's perspective can change our own more than we could ever know. In other countries they have a way for inmates to meet people to write to, why are we stuck in the past? I must admit I did not know her before I wrote and she could have easily never replied to me, but I am so glad she did. Jail can be tough and to have someone caring in your life who is not your family is a big thing. I have come so far thanks to her that I couldn't even tell you. I hope I do get to go over and see her when my parole/sentence is finally over. I've been in so long it seems that I've forgotten what it's like to be free. I do get very depressed over it sometimes but what can you do? Just keep on keeping on and try to never give up. Poetry helps me now and is a big thing in my life taking up a lot of time. I'm lucky I can just come and use the computers during the week or all I've written may never have been. I feel like finally after all these years I have found something I am good at. With the internet around out there and so widely available I'm hoping I can use it and words to make a living somehow. I have added a few more poems for you and thanks again for publishing my other one, it feels really good.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and if you wanted to put it in About Time, that's okay too.

Take care and thanks for the paper as it is About Time, true! I wish you all the success in the world and will always look forward to seeing them every month.

Sincerely,

Bukks

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